Hello, my wife and i have been married for year. During our marriage I went back on drugs and alcohol. I came home one night drunk and high, and I hit my wife. She took out a restraining order and we are separated. I live in a drug treatment facility. She is not talking to me now and she will not tell me if she wants a divorce. Every time I ask her she never answers me. Can you help me please?
#1 by Poppy on June 30, 2010 - 8:09 am
Save her the trouble and file yourself.
#2 by Bibigirl on June 30, 2010 - 8:35 am
She’s thinking it over and waiting to see what you are going to do with yourself.
#3 by rpetch007 on June 30, 2010 - 9:23 am
shes hurt . by your actions .. just give her time to work things out .. but tell her you love her as much as you do thats all ..
#4 by tattedturtle on June 30, 2010 - 9:23 am
There is no telling what another person is going to do. If it were me, I’d be doing the same- cut ties with you!
#5 by ♥dreaneni♥ on June 30, 2010 - 10:02 am
Wow your wife did you a favor and good for her to stand her ground alot of women let this go on. It does not sound like she wants a divorce or I think she will tell you. By her not telling you she just maybe really confused. Give her the time and space she needs after what you put her through. And also you are doing something good for yourself so give yourself a high five for taking care of you!
#6 by fff on June 30, 2010 - 10:33 am
this is the consequnce of your actions – she does not owe you anything, including an explanation or an outline of her plans. hopefully, she will divorce you – in the meantime, you could do her the favor of filing the papers and paying for the divorce yourself. you have already cost her enough.
#7 by Callie Rose on June 30, 2010 - 11:06 am
What do you want? Divorce or stay married to her?
Why don’t you file for divorce, why does she have to?
When you hit her you lost respect for her, and her respect and trust in you. If you were in her shoes, why would you want to get back together with someone who hits you? You hit her once, do you believe you will be able to control yourself enough for the rest of your life to never hit her again? Are you strong enough to never use drugs or alcohol again? I know yes is an easy answer.
Let’s see: she has a restraining order against you, that means NO COMMUNICATION, that violates the restraining order. What’s the hurry on the divorce issue, or you planning on marrying someone else, like real soon?
You know the answer to this question, acknowledging it is the first step to recovery, however, I believe you know that by now.
Good luck, and move on with your life.
#8 by shasta98c on June 30, 2010 - 11:41 am
IF VOU ARE IN A REHAB PROGRAM THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE A FAMILY WEEK WHERE THEY GET TO AIR THE CRAP YOU DID TO THEM. THAT IS THE PLACE TO HAVE THIS CONVERSATION. IN THE MEANTIME, LEAVE HER ALONE. SHE HAS TO DEAL WITH HER FAMILY AND FRIENDS ABOUT YOUR NOT BEING HOME AND WHY. SHE NEEDS TO DECIDE THAT SHE WANTS TO TRY YOU OUT AGAIN OR NOT. YOU GET YOUR POOP IN A GROUP
#9 by Amber on June 30, 2010 - 11:41 am
She needs time to think and u need to respect that. She may be waiting to see if u are honestly interested in getting your life together and getting help or if this is just a temporary thing u are doing. You should be happy she isn’t making any rash decisions. Just give her space and I am sure she will contact u as soon as she decides. If you really want your marriage to work she needs to see u putting all your effort into getting the help u need to stay sober and drug-free. If you want to send her any type of message wait abit and then let her know u are doing well and u miss her……….that’s it. Don’t put pressure on her. Just work on u and the rest will fall into place. Good luck