HI, I am 24 yrs old, married, own my home. My husband makes good money, I am currently looking for work. But my question is this, my little brother is 14. He currently lives with our mom. She is a crack-head literally. And his father (my step-dad) just passed away a month ago. So she has full custody of my brother. I am trying to see what I will need to do, and how difficult it would be to get custody of my brother. My mom has already been to jail, 3 court ordered rehab programs, in 2003 was charged with child endangerment. She has a court record that is a mile long. She is currently still using everyday, she recently has stayed gone for almost 24 straight hours, leaving my little brother home alone over night. With this info, which I can include more if you would like. But with this, what is the best way to go about getting custody of him. He is 14 and has said that he would rather live with me. What are the steps I need to take? What is the likely hood that I will be granted custody?? Any info is helpful! Thanks
We only live about 10 minutes from each other. She will never sign any custody papers to me. She will fight me with everything that she has.
#1 by dundi on April 28, 2010 - 2:07 am
How far away do you live from your brother? Go to a lawyer and have him draw up the documents for your mother to sign that give you full custody of your brother. Then, have her sign them. There must be a way you could bribe her to sign those papers.
Alternately, if your brother “runs away” to your house, how hard will your mother fight to get him back? Especially if you are sending her money every month? Depending on where you live, you could tell her that he wants to come visit for a few weeks this summer. Send her money while he visits. You want her to experience that when he is gone, she has more money. She won’t fight as hard to get him back.
Based on the fact that he is so close, have him run away to you over and over (get him a bike, teach him to take the bus, or have his friends drop him off at your house). Then call social services. Every time she is using, he should run away. When he comes to your house, call the police immediately that you have a run-away. Have them bring him home and see her in an unfit condition This will be reported over and over. After this happens several times over a few months, contact a lawyer and fight for custody. She will be proven an unfit mother. It would be even better if she is so intoxicated that the police will not leave him with her, and ideally will place him with you until a court order is created. If you fail the first time, Repeat repeat repeat! by the way, it would be great if he ran away because he was hungry, or has a toothache or an injury, stomache ache or some other problem. He will have to be a strong kid, but if he is living with her, he is already a strong kid. They will threaten him not to do it again. He could call 911 at his house because he thinks his mother is overdosing in the other room. He could do that several times also and if they tell him to check on her he can just say he is too scared to go in there. They will tell him to put any dogs in the backyard and unlock the front door. Good luck! All of this documentation will help you tremendously.
#2 by Siena on April 28, 2010 - 2:49 am
Your best bet would be to call the children services to see what they say. If the state has been involved, which it sounds like they would have been, they are the best ones to call. They would actually rather place children with some kind of family member than in foster homes. I know you didn’t state that they are looking for foster care, but if the court or state feels your mom is unfit, they will be the first ones to be called. Speak to them and let them know your intentions. It might be helpful to let them know everything about your mom including that she is still using. Good luck.
#3 by Lisa G on April 28, 2010 - 3:48 am
Call child services and explain that your mother
keeps neglecting your brother because she is a
drug addict.
They will check out the house, etc…
They will give you temporary guardianship.
You will be able to file for full guardianship unless
she gets sober…which sounds unlikely.
Best wishes